Soul Cycle is a spin class that is so much more than cardio. It awakens your mind, body, and soul. It leaves you feeling like the boss babe that you are. While the classes are a great workout with fun music, the instructors are people that feel like your personal therapists. My favorite instructor, Dani, is always reminding her class, “Whatever it is; it is already ok.” So when I needed a pick me up, I knew I needed Dani’s spin class.
However, going into the last song of the ride, I was disappointed. I hadn’t felt any epiphany come over my body that made me feel any better with my outlook on life. Then it happened. Dani told us to close our eyes and look within. When I did, I immediately saw 14 year old me. A sophomore in high school, in my cheer uniform, with a beautiful post-braces smile.
Lately I have felt not worthy, not good enough, like a disappointment to myself and others. I have not been as on top of my blog, I have been critical of myself at work, and I have been struggling to find the time for my own self care. However, when I saw this 14 year old version of me, she was SO proud of the woman I have become. 14 year old me never could have dreamed of the person I am right now.
When I stepped back and looked at who I am today with the eyes of who I used to be, I was astounded. On a day to day basis I feel like I fall short. I don’t get my to do list crossed off, I disappoint a friend, I don’t make it to the gym. But when I look at the big picture of who I am today, I am really proud. I have a career I love, a blog that I am passionate about, an incredibly supportive boyfriend, family, and friends.
I guess sometimes all you need is a perspective shift. When you look at yourself from an outside perspective, what you see is actually reality. And whatever it is, it is already ok.